Love!!!!!

Hi Friend,
Just a few things I  think you should know before you embark on this new friendship
If you make me mad I may not speak to you.Make me mad enough,I'll wish you never existed.Hurt me and I'll find a magic wand to erase every good thing you've ever done and the worst will be the only thing I remember.And I'll always remind you of what you've done.
But I Love you tho.

Lol.Imagine someone saying that to you?
Kind of nervy huh?
But we do that all of the time in our actions.
Lately I have been challenged in the "love" area...Not necessarily in that of romantics but, overall.I'm the type of person that doesn't take things at face value,I need core evidence and foundational truth before i can believe it.I need to know that this is the right way.That's one reason why I take my Beliefs in Christ seriously.It doesn't obey the laws of physics(hence our prayers reach Him before we open our mouths).There are no Chemistry formulas that can break down its truths.SO what?How do you believe if it can't be measured?But I will say Christianity requires faith .Not everything is logical.

SO.....getting to the meat of this...I have been struggling with "forgiveness".A ha!
It's one thing to say: "I forgive you,now go on about your business and never show your face again" but another to say :" I forgive you and I love you too...now go on about your business".....lol
Seriously...I thought I had this forgiveness thing in the bag.Forgive so you'll be forgiven....so on and so forth.BUT!....it turns out (through self examination) I forgive on my own terms.I can let it go ,as long as Im not thinking about it..so if I can push this as far a possible to the back of my mind,it keeps it from hurting over and over.NOT SO!....what you try to hide always finds another way out,either in actions or future circumstances.Like...digestion,sooner or later what you eat has got to be released.If it doesn't get out one way,your body will find another and if that way doesn't work,your insides and your whole system is knocked off,and you get sick.Same thing with unforgiveness,you get sick.You;re not well.You;re heart gets hardened and you put so much into this one feeling that all else is affected.

What to do? what to do?
SO I've prayed about this thing.Ask God to help me...and HE has.But I've realized its a process that has a date and time determined by God NOT me...I can't rush recovery.:-/
I have no answers at the moment.Just thoughts and consistent prayer.
"God help me to love like you love.A love like mine isn't a love that you've required.My love holds a grudge,my love secretly has disdain. My love isn't love at all.This is why I NEED you God..."

For no other reason I trust God because life is enough all on its own.I'm convinced and persuaded that God has all the answers and I don't..I know He does.A HA!..Even if He doesn't tell me a single thing.Which is why my trust is in Him.SO if you read this blog and are tired of the rants and raves about Jesus.....I make no apologies.Champions make no apologies for a solid win, hatred makes no apology for the lives lost.SO why should I sigh and be timid about the God who has Loved me and continues to teach me?I wont.I love him and honestly that's the only type of Love I think I've gotten right.

I Corinthians 13

If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don't love, I'm nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. 

If I speak God's Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, "Jump," and it jumps, but I don't love, I'm nothing. 

If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love.

   Love never gives up.
   Love cares more for others than for self.
   Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
   Love doesn't strut,
   Doesn't have a swelled head,
   Doesn't force itself on others,
   Isn't always "me first,"
   Doesn't fly off the handle,
   Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
   Doesn't revel when others grovel,
   Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
   Puts up with anything,
   Trusts God always,
   Always looks for the best,
   Never looks back,
   But keeps going to the end.

Love never dies. Inspired speech will be over some day; praying in tongues will end; understanding will reach its limit. We know only a portion of the truth, and what we say about God is always incomplete. But when the Complete arrives, our incompletes will be canceled.

When I was an infant at my mother's breast, I gurgled and cooed like any infant. When I grew up, I left those infant ways for good.

We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us!

But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love. 

One my pursuit to Love like I've been Loved by God...join me.

John 15:13
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends."

Keeks